Now that I started blogging again, I can't stop. I saw this on Boing Boing this morning: From Officer.com:
Make up some flash cards. On one side, write a phrase or sentence the way you now talk on the stand. On the other side, write the same phrase in plain English. Have one of your kids work with you with your flash cards. It'll be a nice Hallmark family moment. I'll help you get started.
* He indicated... He said * I have been employed by... I worked for * I exited the patrol vehicle... I got out of the car * I observed... I saw * I ascertained the location of the residence... I found the house * I proceeded to the vicinity of... I went to * I approached the entrance... I went to the door * The subject approached me... She came up to me * I apprehended the perpetrator... I arrested the man * I obtained an item that purported to be an envelope from the individual... I got the envelope from her * I observed the subject fleeing on foot from the location... I saw him running away
This is totally true! I did 8 weeks of grand jury duty in the district two years ago - a most educational experience, I'll tell you about it some time - and the officers who testified all spoke this way. Also, they called me ma'am, which made me giggle, but I was the foreperson, so I wasn't supposed to giggle.